People keep asking me, “What has sustained you on this journey you have just been through?” They are referring to my daughter’s sickness for the last 2 plus years and her journey into freedom. But there is so much more. We are all on this journey we call life. We came back to this plane for some reason—usually many reasons—and which include pledges and unfilled promises we have made in what we like to call the past.
We are each and every moment making choices that serve some part of our being. They serve or fears, they serve our greatness, they serve our joys, they serve our unhappiness. They all serve us in some way. Many of our decisions are made on auto pilot and they are the same things that we have always done or what we have seen done around us. Therefore, they have the internal seal of approval.
I want to share this story in hopes that you can see yourself in it not just for shock value.
There was this woman who lived on the fringes of our community. I used to run into her at the spa quite often. She was overweight and always complaining about something. Over the years, the complaints got more extreme till it looked like she lost everything. Her marriage, her business, she got the boobie prize of the house which was underwater. She was deeply unhappy. I always invited her to come to class as my guest. She never came.
One time last year, I came home from a trip and got a Facebook message from her saying there was a Gurudwara (our temple) prayer for her that evening. I responded back saying I was quite sick but would send her prayers and to let me know how I can help. Her daughter sent back a Facebook post saying, “She died.” I knew at that moment that she had not just died but she had killed herself. I called someone in the community and they verified that yes, she had killed herself. She hung herself in the tree in her backyard. This is the part I want you to pay attention to: her father and two, yes two, of her brothers had also killed themselves. So suicide was an acceptable way to exit for this family.
I want you to look at what is acceptable suicide in your family, your clan, and your society. What patterns take you out? Do you want to change them? We can all create patterns that uplift us. Yes, they may be more difficult to create but so worth the effort.
This is what happened on my journey. I got to see how my daughter, no matter what happened, uplifted anyone who came into her presence—right up to the end. She would hug and kiss and touch and smile and love. Against all odds and pain and everything she didn’t want, she was loving and graceful.
How could I not also be? I had to do yoga and meditate not to get lost in the pain of my child and see the miracle of a life lived to the max—a life that mattered to everyone around her in her entire life. As one of her friends said, “It was so easy to be Pritham’s friend.” Is it easy to be your friend, your love, yourself?
I want ease for you. So, what will you do to create more ease in your life? I’ve written so many things and what came out of my meditation on how I could share what has sustained me this lifetime is my book Get your Essence Back. It was written a while back but it drives home the message I’m trying to impart here. The answer that people seek on what sustained me through my journey is here http://darkhibernation.com/store/get-your-skinny-back/ or if you just want a taste to see if you deserve more support, then try this http://darkhibernation.com/store/books-of-enlightenment/
Deep love and gratitude on this journey called life.